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AA, actualization, Aleister Crowley, betterment, chaos, chaos magick, Crowley, discovery, empowerment, esoteric, happiness, hedonism, joy, know thyself, knowing, magic, magick, musing, NA, narcotics anonymous, order, personal, pleasure, power, psych, psychology, robert anton wilson, self, self help, Spirituality, thelema, undo, undoing, worldview
When I would hear the axiom, “Know thyself”, I took it as a call for self discovery or self actualization. Naturally, this is a critical element, becoming aware in an almost intimate sense of everything that makes up who I am – my beliefs, my hopes, my dreams, my preconceived notions, my worldview, my boundaries and expectations. Still, one thing that I’ve overlooked is that all of these things are NOT REAL. They exist solely as ideals or visions within my head. They can be empowering or liberating but more often than not they are instead restricting in the most severe sense.
I would instead say that first and foremost I must get to know myself but with the intention to undo myself afterwards. Anything that does not serve ME, anything that inhibits my blossoming, my growth and development, whatever limits the actualization of who I am and what I am capable of becoming must ultimately be eradicated. Yet before I can eliminate any of these chains that bind me I must first locate and understand what they are and what purpose they have served thus far. Whatever makes me truly happy, without conditions or prerequisites should be pursued with much zeal and enthusiasm.
I am not my hopes nor ideals, nor am I my own expectations. These are all a conglomeration or hodgepodge of what society deems acceptable, successful or necessary. Even my understandings of what “society”, “culture” or “lifestyles” are is still just that, my own understanding and perception and therefore fallible and subject to change at a moments notice. The reality is that there is no reality, at least that is my reality. The absolute truth is that there are no absolutes and what is truth to me is truth so long as I acknowledge it as such.
What I am becoming is a hedonist of sorts. I seek my own pleasure, my own joy, my own satisfaction above all else. Anything standing in the way of attaining this fulfillment is not worthy of investing my time, energy, emotion or finances in. Whatsoever serves me, whatsoever moves me to positive action, whatsoever brings out the best in me; only these things are worthy and acceptable and necessary. In the words of the infamous and notorious Great Beast, Aleister Crowley, “Do what thou wilt shall me the whole of the law. Love is the law, Love under Will.”